Posts
Step 1:
After ordering, wrangle your beast over to a table. Slowly unwrap the monstrosity. Let it sit and soak up the "Ooooh's" and "Ahhhh's" from the onlookers. Get up and get a lot of napkins. Slowly let out a comforting belch. Return to your saddle.
Step 2:
Grab the burrito with your left hand, somewhere near the bottom. Place your right hand underneath where you are going to take bites (this may be switched do to handedness). Stare the bull in the face and use your mind to let it know that it is about to be slain.
Step 3:
Clench your fangs above your right hand, into the burritos tightly wrapped tortilla (remember to bite hard, because it will lash back). Tear fully through the tortilla. Continue this process until you reach your right hand. Upon this happening, slide your hand down the burrito to avoid being bitten. Keep doing this until the burritos innards begin to spew from within.
Step 4:
When the innards have properly been spilled onto the wrapper inside the basket which once held the monster, place the burrito back in it's original starting place. Swallow whatever bite you have. Stare at that mother fucker and tell him to GO TO HELL!
Step 5 & 6:
Grab "Chips" bag. Remove three to five chips. Begin to scoop some of the burritos innards onto the chip. Eat until mainly tortilla is left.
Step 7:
When there is mainly tortilla sitting inside the basket, with the beasts insides lying all around it, grab the fork again. Begin shoveling the tortilla in your mouth. Don't get too much though. This is a high risk task, and thou must take caution. Take breaks to chew and taunt the remains of the demon food.
Step 8:
Whence tortilla is gone, take a second and ponder at what's left. Get the mindset that the battle is near an end. Grab five to seven chips. Go for the backdoor scoop and scoop remains onto the fork. Continue this process until burrito is gone.
Well, the task has been handled. How do you feel? Rise up, and lift your arms into the air! Exclaim to the world the feat you have just overcome! Let them know, that any burrito, of any land may wish to bring fear among eaters everywhere, but you, Champion of All will conquer that bitch!
This blog is dedicated to Dave Cawall. Nice work :)
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Cruel and Unusual
I just recently found this article on Facebook entitled "Death Penalty for Keith Randulich." These people that are in this group are sick. These are the people that agree with the death penalty. Listen to how sick they are. Except for Nick James, his comment is sensible and non-barbaric.
Connor Prokop (Lincoln - Way East High School) wroteat 10:34pm yesterday
actually....he should be put in for life.....that way he gets raped everyday....THAT is torture(if u dont like it)
Michael Cornell You wanna know torture, howabout we tape his fingers together as we hang him, so he will sruggle trying to grab on for one last breath. THAT is torture.
Michael Cornell
yeah, tortured. he gets to use exercise equipment, that citizens cant because we have to pay for a club membership, for free, then he can watch all the FREE cable we can't, has a guaranteed meal, and a guatanteed place to sleep. sounds like torture to me guys.
Kaytie Jaskowiak-Martin
personally..i believe that if he is found guilty he should have to suffer for what he did. No one should get away with this. But think of how he will be treated in prison. He will be tortured and he will pay for what he did. If you kill someone..they can no longer suffer. i say..he should go to prison for the rest of his life. And have to live with what he did..knowing that shed still be alive if it wasnt for him..and have to think about what it does to his parents..and seeing them the way they will be because of this.
Michael Cornell
its a temporary ban, and the trial is not over. And in all honesty, it hasnt been proven in court, but he did it. Just look at the facts, the answer of who did it shouts his name.
Nick James
He was in my class and I did not know him well, but he hasn't been found guilty and he did not admit to killing her, so you may be agreeing for someone innocent to be put to death, also Illinois death penalty has been suspended, so exert your time for a cause that can actually be won and has a use in society.
Chris Graf
idk i mean i dont know him but don't you think its a little harsh to give him death i mean send him to the mental hospital his parents just lost one and they will lose him to if they kill him. Lets not think abot him and think about the family they just had him kill there baby. I just think he should be locked up
Danielle Marie
i went to school with him from 1st to 8th grade. he never seemed messed up or anything. he a was nice kid then til now
Mike Mitchell
This kid needs either 1. To have the death penalty... who cares if its expensive, look what the hell he did for fuck sake, or 2. be put into a mental institution for the rest of his life. and then his parents behind him, because honestly, hes their OWN kid... if they couldnt tell that he was a little bit loopy before he just straight up slices and dices up his sister... like they obviously arent doing a very good parenting job
Steve D Mihaljevic
Cory,the cost to keep a person in prison is about 100-140k a year, the cost to give him the death pentaly is FAAAAAR CHEAPER over the long haul.. What you want to spean 7.5-8 million dollars to keep this guy in prison the next 60 years! Fuck em.QUOTE FROM A PREVIOUS POSTER CORY BELOW>>>>>"The thing about the dealth penalty that many people don't understand, is that is it really expensive. With all the appeals a person can go through, it is just dragging out the sentance on death row. I have attached an article that kind of explains California's issues with the death penalty, it is pretty much the same idea. http://www.finalcall.com/artman/publish/article_4731.shtmlBut I do think that this group is kind of insensitive to his family. Think about it; they have already lost one child horrifically, and they are about to lose their other. "
Steve D Mihaljevic
Yeah yeah everyone thinks divorced parents half sisters and brothers and collapse of the family unit is not havign an effect on kids and society.. KEEP DREAMING FOLKS>> KEEEEP ON DRINKING THE COOL AIDERiiiight its all fine no big deal, until a guy slices his half sister up because he is jealous of her getting affection and his real parent isnt around etc etc.
Kevin Burk
sick fuck. give him death
Kevin Kiley
i went to school with this kid since first grade. he was on my basketball team and everything. he never seemed that fucked up but its horrible.
Anna Peterson
I feel we shouldn't stoop down to his level and decide his fate, like he did with that four year old girl...so i disagree with the death penalty for him..but i feel that he should spend the rest of his life in jail...hopefully the memory of him killing that little girl haunting him.
Justin Bramstadt
kill this motherfucker, if yhe goons in jail dont get him first, wat a sick bastard i hope he dies a horrible death
Derrick Dahlman
bet he only gets 60-life/mental inst.
Ryan Matusik
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/02/06/illinois-keeping-death-pe_n_164767.html...
Carollynn Franson
this kid lives down the street from me.................. scary he should burn in hell
Bob Noetzel
they shoud burn this pussy and let the family members of the girl piss on his ashes
What does cost have to do with someones life?! To kill someone because they killed is nomadic and silly. It isn't going to solve anything, but give the people with so much hate for this kid the satisfaction they want.
Connor Prokop (Lincoln - Way East High School) wroteat 10:34pm yesterday
actually....he should be put in for life.....that way he gets raped everyday....THAT is torture(if u dont like it)
Michael Cornell You wanna know torture, howabout we tape his fingers together as we hang him, so he will sruggle trying to grab on for one last breath. THAT is torture.
Michael Cornell
yeah, tortured. he gets to use exercise equipment, that citizens cant because we have to pay for a club membership, for free, then he can watch all the FREE cable we can't, has a guaranteed meal, and a guatanteed place to sleep. sounds like torture to me guys.
Kaytie Jaskowiak-Martin
personally..i believe that if he is found guilty he should have to suffer for what he did. No one should get away with this. But think of how he will be treated in prison. He will be tortured and he will pay for what he did. If you kill someone..they can no longer suffer. i say..he should go to prison for the rest of his life. And have to live with what he did..knowing that shed still be alive if it wasnt for him..and have to think about what it does to his parents..and seeing them the way they will be because of this.
Michael Cornell
its a temporary ban, and the trial is not over. And in all honesty, it hasnt been proven in court, but he did it. Just look at the facts, the answer of who did it shouts his name.
Nick James
He was in my class and I did not know him well, but he hasn't been found guilty and he did not admit to killing her, so you may be agreeing for someone innocent to be put to death, also Illinois death penalty has been suspended, so exert your time for a cause that can actually be won and has a use in society.
Chris Graf
idk i mean i dont know him but don't you think its a little harsh to give him death i mean send him to the mental hospital his parents just lost one and they will lose him to if they kill him. Lets not think abot him and think about the family they just had him kill there baby. I just think he should be locked up
Danielle Marie
i went to school with him from 1st to 8th grade. he never seemed messed up or anything. he a was nice kid then til now
Mike Mitchell
This kid needs either 1. To have the death penalty... who cares if its expensive, look what the hell he did for fuck sake, or 2. be put into a mental institution for the rest of his life. and then his parents behind him, because honestly, hes their OWN kid... if they couldnt tell that he was a little bit loopy before he just straight up slices and dices up his sister... like they obviously arent doing a very good parenting job
Steve D Mihaljevic
Cory,the cost to keep a person in prison is about 100-140k a year, the cost to give him the death pentaly is FAAAAAR CHEAPER over the long haul.. What you want to spean 7.5-8 million dollars to keep this guy in prison the next 60 years! Fuck em.QUOTE FROM A PREVIOUS POSTER CORY BELOW>>>>>"The thing about the dealth penalty that many people don't understand, is that is it really expensive. With all the appeals a person can go through, it is just dragging out the sentance on death row. I have attached an article that kind of explains California's issues with the death penalty, it is pretty much the same idea. http://www.finalcall.com/artman/publish/article_4731.shtmlBut I do think that this group is kind of insensitive to his family. Think about it; they have already lost one child horrifically, and they are about to lose their other. "
Steve D Mihaljevic
Yeah yeah everyone thinks divorced parents half sisters and brothers and collapse of the family unit is not havign an effect on kids and society.. KEEP DREAMING FOLKS>> KEEEEP ON DRINKING THE COOL AIDERiiiight its all fine no big deal, until a guy slices his half sister up because he is jealous of her getting affection and his real parent isnt around etc etc.
Kevin Burk
sick fuck. give him death
Kevin Kiley
i went to school with this kid since first grade. he was on my basketball team and everything. he never seemed that fucked up but its horrible.
Anna Peterson
I feel we shouldn't stoop down to his level and decide his fate, like he did with that four year old girl...so i disagree with the death penalty for him..but i feel that he should spend the rest of his life in jail...hopefully the memory of him killing that little girl haunting him.
Justin Bramstadt
kill this motherfucker, if yhe goons in jail dont get him first, wat a sick bastard i hope he dies a horrible death
Derrick Dahlman
bet he only gets 60-life/mental inst.
Ryan Matusik
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/02/06/illinois-keeping-death-pe_n_164767.html...
Carollynn Franson
this kid lives down the street from me.................. scary he should burn in hell
Bob Noetzel
they shoud burn this pussy and let the family members of the girl piss on his ashes
What does cost have to do with someones life?! To kill someone because they killed is nomadic and silly. It isn't going to solve anything, but give the people with so much hate for this kid the satisfaction they want.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)